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Still, introverts, especially men, who Hartman and Cain agreed face different expectations than women, may find it difficult to ask out someone they've been messaging.

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To remedy this, Hartman advises joining a dating website like e Harmony, which only makes visible profiles of people who the algorithm matches.“Most of the fears that people have, that fear is over as quickly as they do it," she said."They’re afraid that everybody sees them, and then they realize that nobody sees them.Hartman said the key to feeling comfortable is to focus on making the other person feel the same. "Try to meet people partway and if it feels nerve-wracking, don’t focus on your own feelings of discomfort. That’s the backwards irony of all this: They’re so focused on their own feelings.If they focus on making others feel comfortable, they’ll feel comfortable, too.” Not getting enough out of a conversation — or worse, waiting for a message — can be a sign that two people don't share the same communication style.As annoying that is, you’re not being exposed in a negative way.” Cain said that having a focus on the positive aspects of online dating can help overcome hurdles.