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I impose the most rules, restrictions, and justifications in my life.As the chief lawmaker of my own village, I abide by a somewhat irrational code of conduct.In addition to passing judgment, people make assumptions about what I like, how I feel, and what I eat.It’s always strange and amusing when a man is shocked to learn that I’m successful in my career, drive a new car, live in a nice home, etc.Nobody likes to be insulted, and when it’s super-cruel in this way, it’s utterly heartbreaking. Worse, some men are fetishists and like you in such a way that it’s actually creepy to be around them.Those are the guys who “really love a cuddler” and couldn’t care less about getting to know you.But my big hips preclude me from being relationship material? Some men assume that if you’re overweight, you are also desperate and use that as an excuse to treat you like dirt.

In fact, I happen to be a very friendly person with a solid sense of humor.

I wrote this for the Bold Italic, for whom I had a short-lived freelance writing career.

They wanted something honest about being my size and dating in Los Angeles.

I don't know why, but I finally felt like sharing it.

Finding love is always challenging, but it’s especially hard in a city with tunnel-vision-like focus on appearance for someone who doesn’t match the high standards set for beauty in Los Angeles.