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Dating after loss husband

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It was there that Michelle found herself thrown into the company of his best friend, Adrian Mc Collin, 36, a project manager for a building company.'Ade was one of the friends who came to sit with Jon,' she says. 'Now it was comforting to sit together beside Jon and reminisce about happy times.While she says that finding solace with another man has helped her to deal with her devastation, some may feel uncomfortable about a widow embarking on a new love affair only a month after her husband's death.Jon's mother, Val, has been so hurt by her daughter-in-law's behaviour that she has cut off all contact. Yet she is not alone in seeking romance soon after losing her husband.I'd been my husband George's caregiver as he'd succumbed to cancer. If you'd asked me then, I would have said that I'm fifty, I have 32 years of memories, I'm not interested in sex. I thought I might get a cat, once I was ready to take care of anything again.What I got instead was an unlikely best friend who'd helped me look after George.'That was the moment when we could have cracked,' admits Michelle. We decided that while there was life, there was hope. To him, that would have been an admission of defeat.' But, the fear was still clearly at the back of both their minds. 'It may seem rash, but I knew that, if the worst happened and I lost Jon, I wanted to have a part of him in my life. He said he wanted to leave something of himself behind - it was the first time he'd ever mentioned the possibility of dying.' Their son, Sam, was born in December 2004. Holding him, Jon burst into tears and admitted that he didn't know whether he was crying with joy or sadness because he knew he might not see his son grow up.

It is, she says, exactly what Jon would have wanted.

'But how can you make rules with people's emotions? But, beneath his irreverent sense of humour, Michelle rapidly discovered a gentle, caring nature. 'I'd been divorced for a year and was still very wary of men, but Jon was so sweet-natured that I felt instantly comfortable.' Not surprisingly after a failed marriage, Michelle was happy to take things slowly.

But everything changed when, just a few months into their relationship Jon began complaining of headaches. He must have been petrified by the news, but he didn't break down. Naively, I assumed that the surgeon would remove the tumour and that would be an end of the problem.' Naive or not, Michelle decided to stay with Jon, come what may.

I was tired of having experiences for their own sake.

Within a week I'd stopped dating anyone but my boyfriend. My reawakening since my husband died really surprised me.